I love her, or at least I think I do. I know that I am still learning to love her, and I also know that she does not love me the way I love her. At the moment I am standing on a cliff, preparing to jump, and hoping that the wind shall carry me before I crash and shatter on rocks down beneath. I have developed fantasies and realistic dreams for an unrealistic situation. I know that I am hunting a mirage or haunted by one, that my high hopes will not pass the test of reality, but it seems that logic cannot defuse love, rather it irritates it even more.